what should i do now???

i was in love with a girl so deeply n madly... she too loved me so madly that she can neva bear even if an ant bites me.. then we started to fight for even silly things.... i'm too light hearted...can't bear anything....
to be frank enough i'm was cancer patient who went to germany n got treatment to live a happy life with her... i'm just 19 now... she's one year younger than me... our life was just full of fights.... no love nothing... but stilll i couldn't even think bad abt her since i thought her as my mother...as i don have my mother... i used to call her too in the same way when i long for my mom's love n care... but still she was flirting with guys even in front of me... i just stayed calm as i dun want to hurt her in any ways... nut one day,iwent to her city n we went to a mall together... suddenly she got a call frm some guy... she said she've to leave to urgently to her house as her mother is calling her.... left me in the mall just like that... i don know where should i go to board the bus even.... i just walked 8kms with eyes full of tears... only then i thought,y should i still be hanging for her,when she never deserves such a purest form of love.....
then day n nyt i thought abt this... cried aloud... n started to come away frm her... told her diectly that i don need her.. n now she too staying away frm me... but my stupid heart is still suffering to throw her completely away from my life.... i thought my mother have appeared in her soul to keep me happy..... tell me what should i do now????